Too much anger

17 Jun

http://www.wayneandtamara.com/RelationshipAdviceAnger.htm

Spoiled The Child

My boyfriend is gentle and kind, loving and respectful.  Ninety-eight percent of the time everything is perfect.  Once in awhile his temper flares.  Then he curses, screams, and throws things.

He never harms me, but it is scary.  I don’t know what to do to calm him down.  He suggested talking to his mother, which I did, but she used to just leave and take a walk.  We are talking marriage, but I don’t want to consider children with him if his anger isn’t controlled.

Evette

Dear Evette,

Why not ask for him to go to therapy?  It’s a tool in the toolbox meant for situation that are out of your ability to manage.  This seems like a perfect opportunity for you to broach the topic.  Come from a position of love.  Say you are concerned with the way he deals with conflict and think a therapist might be a way to come up with an alternate way to process those moments.  Say you can’t handle this yourself but there are people who have had years of experience in school and practice dealing with these issues.  Hopefully he loves you and is willing to commit to self-improvement on this issue.  Good luck,

Poly

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